2001-08-22-4:58 p.m.>

Its this funny feeling in my stomach.

Uneasy.

I've been suffering from for the past week, and its been the cause of much broken sleep. Frankly Im worried.

I'll go to bed at say 1, and turn on my side, stare at my white wall covered in pictures of Ben Folds(5) wide eyed. And just wait, for my body tire, for my mind to slow. But it doesnt happen. And at 6, Im still staring at my wall, wide eyed. And I have to trudge through the day bleary from no sleep.

Every little task becomes liquified with my slow motions. Fluid,soft,and slow.

Maybe its a dream.

Maybe the past year of my life has been a dream, and tomorrow I'll wake up in the bed of the guestroom at my cousin Roz's house in Vegas. And I'll get to do it all over.

That entire 10 days, the entire year of upset that followed. My breakdown,my recovery,my parting of ways with things I just couldnt deal with.

Nah, that only happens on groundhog day to Bill Murray. And its August, and Im Melissa.