01.02.02-11:20 p.m.>

Im really discouraged these past few days, I can feel myself falling into a funk and I just dont know what to do about it.

Im dissappointed in my surroundings and generally really lonely.

People are so complicated and it seems that every attempt I make at reaching out to people is made in vain.

What am I, a joke ?

No, really.

WHAT AM I ?

People just dont take me seriously, ever at all.

Why ?

It really grates on my nerves.

I am 20 yrs old. I am intelligent, and witty, and open minded, I can hold thoughtful conversation.

What is it ?

Why do I not matter ?

to anyone ?

Why is it that people see fit to constantly hurt my feelings ?

I am a good person.

Hi Melissa

Bye Melissa

Hey Melissa

How are you Melissa ?

You dont care. Dont act like you care, because you dont. So why do I bother ? Why do I invest my feelings into any of anything.

Why do I take steps that put me close to people ?

So much frustration and hurt and anger and confusion and I dont know where to put any of it or who to tell or where to start or what to say.

Sometimes I really despise myself.