04.11.02-2:35 p.m.>

Will life ever get easier for me ?

EVER.

I fucking hate trials and tribulations and being upset and not knowing how to not be upset and nervous.

I fucking hate that I'm so weak.

I hate that I make myself like this.

That when I get upset I can't breathe, and my stomach turns to shit, and I can't compose myself.

ever.

I HATE HATE HATE MYSELF right now, so so so so so so much.

breathe, melissa , breathe.

I can't.

I am such a bloody mess.