05.27.02-12:01 a.m.>

I would like to be able to sleep for once without being bogged down by my thoughts and my fears and the what ifs. I would like to look as happy as people do in pictures.

I would like to not be so scared of being close to people.

I would like to not be so obsessed with death and sickness.

I would like to rewind to my birthday and undo the traumas that are unfolding into messes in my living room on a nightly basis.

I would like to trade places with her,just to ease her fears, because it kills me to think about what she must be thinking about.

I would like to not be so tired.

I would like to be able to keep my room clean.

I would like to be energized and motivated even.

I would like to not complain so much and criticize so much.

I would like to be a better friend.

I would like a lot of things,apparently.