older-contact-homeland-me-notes

03.09.03-6:50 p.m.>

re�la�tion�ship ( P ) Pronunciation Key (r-lshn-shp)

n.

The condition or fact of being related; connection or association.

Connection by blood or marriage; kinship.

A particular type of connection existing between people related to or having dealings with each other: has a close relationship with his siblings.

A romantic or sexual involvement.

friend ( P ) Pronunciation Key (frnd)

n.

A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.

A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.

A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.

One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement: friends of the clean air movement.

Friend A member of the Society of Friends; a Quaker.

I've hit this wall.

Emotionally,

Just this wall, that you cant get over or around.

I have this idea about whats on the other side. Mainly based on the sight of what other people have. These formulas followed and acted out like little monologues.

I spent all this time running away from the fact that I couldnt deal with how much thought went to how I felt and analyzed things, and now Im here,at the end of the line, and that wall is so thick and high and hard to get around, and I can hear these voices on the other side.

Functional Relationships, lacking in drama.

Appointments kept. made.

Promises never broken.

Productivity.

A shoulder to rest my head on.

A voice to ask me whats wrong when Im looking farther away then I should be. Answers to my questions

Laughter when Im singing along to "I do, I do, I do".

Bellyaches from inside jokes played over like a broken record.

Problems, Solutions

Conflict

Criticism, Constructive.

NO MORE DISTANCE.

Favorite movies, Favorite Songs.

Birthday Cards, Stories.

Drinks, More stories.

Late nights, moooore stories.

Running places till our sides ached.

Beating the moon in the race to see who can stay out the longest.

Being better, and taller, and more thoughtful than the skanks and their fake hair and tight pants and cell phones and cigarettes and leased cars and house music.

Being more verbose than the boys in the muscle shirts and their hooked up civics who arent worth our conversation.

Dancing like no one can see, and singing like no one can hear.

Knowing all the words to all the songs on the new wave station and loving every second of "Love Will tear us apart".

NO MORE DISTANCE.

The water, and the sky, the bay and the south shore.

Pages filled with black ink.

Notes left in windshields.

Secrets.

This is where I am, this is what I want. This is what I see.

Become part of my solution if you love what I love.

If you can grasp the concept of a 22 year old girl who loves Cartoons and Van Halen circa 1984, her tivo, and The Naked Chef, Childrens Books, and rubbing dandelions on other peoples arms,Geek Rock, and Lisa Loeb, and the perfect pop song, and lip gloss, and poor punctuation when the words want to flow,Brian Wilson, and Abba, and bold text, Pete and Pete, and Harold and Maude.

If you can relate...

then Im calling you out.

(most random confusing entry ever)